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Post by Gleming123 on Apr 29, 2005 5:21:16 GMT 10
Hiyas, I'm a new writer...On this forums , I'll just point a few things before I start: This is one of my first Semi-real life stories, I tend to write Action/adventure/Suspense/Horror/ And all that mumbo jumbo DO NOT call me Glemmy Wemmy, or any other crazy nickname I put on my stories, I highly dislike it Making notice of comments I've gotten on my past stories, PLEASE don't post "Fried Chicken", I know it sounds foolishly foolish, I know it is completely irrelevant to the story, but it seems peps just like posting that... The forums I'm used to write on only holds 1500 letters per post, and I'm kinda used to it... so I'll only use 1500 letters per post, I hope you don't mind With that said, I'll start the story on the next post
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Post by Gleming123 on Apr 29, 2005 5:22:15 GMT 10
With one last effort I pushed the last boulder out of the way, daylight poured into the shelter, and a vague feeling of hope; that it was all over, gave me the energy needed to creep out of the shelter. I observed the area around me, when I first entered the shelter, the flowers were just blossoming, sign that spring was just starting. But there weren’t any flowers, just dead grey leaves all over the place.
I glanced at the forest, everything was dead, there weren't even animals around, just a grey background, as if all the color and life had been leached from the whole world, this though ran through my mind briefly, but then I noticed the sleeves of my crimson red coat. Then I stared at my white T-shirt as if I haven't seen colors for a long time and had forgotten how they looked like; Indeed, I haven't seen colors in a long time, as the cave I sheltered in was pitch dark, and I only had a small torch, which died a few days after I had entered the shelter. A shiver ran down my spine, and for the first time I noticed that maybe, perhaps, I was the last person alive in the country.
I guess you don't have the slightest idea of what's going on, so I'll go back in time a month ago, when it all started.
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Post by Gleming123 on Apr 29, 2005 5:24:35 GMT 10
.=*=. A Month Ago .=*=.
It was just another day, I was relaxing on my bed watching T.V while listening to my favorite radio station when an announcement no one was expecting was made; A group of global terrorists were threatening the whole country with an atomic bomb that was supposed to explode in two weeks, and the countdown had already started. At first I though it was a joke, but moments later there was an interference in the T.V and the same message was repeated, I still had my doubts about this, but it alarmed me bit, as something like this had never happened before. I called a few friends and they told me it was just a joke, and that there was nothing to worry about. I did as they said and continued my life normally for couple of days, a week to be exact.
There was another interference and the same message was repeated, this time on every single television and radio station in the country; everyone had started to panic, In the first day all the flights were already booked, but no one managed to escape, as all the ways of transport out of the country were closed, trapping everyone inside, that’s when the chaos started.
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Post by Gleming123 on Apr 29, 2005 5:25:31 GMT 10
At first there were just minor strikes, the usual gathering a bunch with signs and shouting like mad ones, but once they noticed it wasn't working, they started doing riots, kidnapping familiars of important members of the government, demanding a way to get out of the country. But it was in vain, not even the highest members of the government could escape. Then they started building "Shelters", out of very resistant metals and stocking up on food, little did they knew that the radiation was going to be enhanced by the metals, causing a more painful death. The ones that couldn't afford to make a "shelter" started robbing everywhere, others threw parties non-stop. In other words, everyone had lost their mind.
Saying that everyone had lost their minds is not exactly true, as there were a couple of people here and there that were still thinking logically, you could said I was one of them.
I'm just a normal teenage lad, a tad tall, quite fit, black hair, and that’s nearly all I am. I'm quite a slacker, as I hardly do my homework or assignments, not that I didn’t knew how to do them, I just didn't bothered to do them. My difference from the run-of-a-mill slacker was what saved me.
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Post by Gleming123 on Apr 29, 2005 5:26:11 GMT 10
Science was a subject that I've been interested on since a long time, but alas, I still failed that subject every year. The only thing that kept me from being kicked out off school was that I always had straight A's on the final exams, and as they counted as 50% of the final grade, I always passed. Back to science, I was always advanced on it, while the class was studying the basics about particles I was already looking at the trends on the periodic table. That’s how I learned what happens when an atom divides, the reaction we call "Atomic Bomb" An atomic bomb is caused by a chain reaction, started by a neutron breaking an atom, which splitted into two new atoms, which unleashed a neutron each that breaked another two atoms, which splitted into 4 new atoms, which unleashed a neutron each that breaked another 4 atoms, and so on. The reaction gave away large amounts of heat and something called "radiation". Some of you might have heard of it, y'know, that dangerous stuff that kills everyone on the sci-fi movies? Yep, that one. Anyway, if you manage to survive the explosion, but the radiation reaches you, you'll be facing a slow and painful death. The thing that I learned about radiation that saved me was that the only thing that radiation did not affect was magnetism. So if a magnetized material surrounded my shelter, I might be able to survive. I'm sure that you don't want a lesson about basic chemistry, so let's just say that in six days I already had the shelter ready and I just needed to stock up with food
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Post by Gleming123 on Apr 29, 2005 5:27:10 GMT 10
I took my back pack and headed towards the shop I usually go to with my friends, to my surprise, the shop was in ruins, just when I arrived a bunch of fellas had just left the shop, some of them grasping a metal tube, a few even a knife. Suddenly one of them saw me, shouted something I didn't get, and in a split of a second I found himself being running for my life, good thing I am quite fit, as I would had been dead meat if they had managed to catch up with me. I hid behind a pile of crates to regain some breath Once my heart had calmed down, I took a look at my surrounding, as funny as it seems, I had ended up right next to a shop, and it seemed no one had stormed in yet; God bless my luck. I took out my ol' n' trusty twin clips, and started working my way in...
There was a light click and the door opened, I closed the door and admired all the goods that were waiting to be taken, I unzipped my backpack and started filling it with everything I saw, from bags of marshmallows to gummy bears. Once it was full, I headed directly to his shelter, as everyone on my neighborhood, including my family, had also lost it.
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Post by Gleming123 on Apr 29, 2005 5:29:48 GMT 10
It was an 8 hours walk to the shelter, a safe distance from the explosion. The shelter was open for anyone to enter for now, to close it I had to be inside and pull the door, it was very similar to a garage. When the door was closed, boulders would fall hiding the entrance from anyone that could be passing nearby. I double-checked the things to make sure I wasn't missing anything, once I was done, I closed the shelter.
It was pitch dark inside, good thing I brought a small torch a friend of mine had given me a long time ago, I turned it on, took out a bag of cheetos, and ate them slowly, trying to make time pass by quicker. After the third bag I drifted to sleep. Two days later the torch died and my only source of light was gone. But I continued like normally, with a bit of difficulty finding the food, but there weren't any other changes.
This became my routine for a week, until suddenly, there was a very loud bang and the ground trembled vigorously, I feared that the roof was going to collapse on top of me, but it didn't fall, and in a matter of seconds the ground stopped shaking, I decided to wait another day before coming out, just in case there were any secondary effects still present
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Post by Gleming123 on Apr 29, 2005 5:31:13 GMT 10
The next day I opened the door and found myself facing a large barricade of boulders, I had overlooked them boulders on my plan. Without hesitating, I started to move the boulders out of the way. It took a long while and I was exhausted, but I was nearly done. With one last effort I pushed the last boulder out of the way, daylight poured into the shelter, and a vague feeling of hope; that it was all over, gave me the energy needed to creep out of the shelter. I observed the area around me, when I first entered the shelter, the flowers were just blossoming, sign that spring was just starting. But there weren’t any flowers, just dead grey leaves all over the place.
I glanced at the forest, everything was dead, there weren't even animals around, just a grey background, as if all the color and life had been leached from the whole world, this though ran through my mind briefly, but then I noticed the sleeves of my crimson red coat. Then I stared at my white T-shirt as if I haven't seen colors for a long time and had forgotten how they looked like; Indeed, I haven't seen colors in a long time, as the cave I sheltered in was pitch dark, and I only had a small torch, which died a few days after I had entered the shelter. A shiver ran down my spine, and for the first time I noticed that maybe, perhaps, I was the last person alive in the country.
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Post by Gleming123 on Apr 29, 2005 5:32:06 GMT 10
I dashed to the nearest city to see if there was someone else alive, but all I found was a ghost town. I started wandering across the streets, still with the hope of finding another survivor, when a newspaper on the floor attracted my attention. I picked it up and read the front page, I learned that my country was not the only one that was attacked, in fact, the whole world was attacked. I had lost all hope of finding someone, I even started to have some doubts if I should continue living like this, desolated in an empty world, forever... "It's not worth it...", I started sweating, "It's not worth it...", and there it was again, “It’s not worth it...” stop! "It's not worth it...", I started running uphill, "It's not worth it...", Indeed, It was not worth it, I dashed towards the end and suddenly did a 180 degrees turn without losing speed, then I bailed, I regained control of the situation briefly, but it was too late, I was already falling, the sight of the ground so far below made me panic once again, and I desperately tried to "fly?", but I just found myself doing some crazy twirls in the air, just before I hitted the ground, I screamed with all the energy I had left "IT'S NOT WORTH IT!!!"
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Post by Gleming123 on Apr 29, 2005 5:34:52 GMT 10
And that's the story of how I ended up being the last living specimen of the Humans, and ended up suiciding, vanquishing the last trace of the human race of the earth, thing that, by the way, didn't happened I hope you enjoyed it
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Blu
Innocent Moderator
Also known as : Ari
Cagalli x Athrun
Posts: 1,053
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Post by Blu on Apr 29, 2005 6:25:03 GMT 10
A group of global terrorists were threatening the whole country with an atomic bomb that was supposed to explode in two weeks, and the countdown had already started. XD So American... lol At first there were just minor strikes, the usual gathering a bunch with signs and shouting like mad ones, but once they noticed it wasn't working, they started doing riots, kidnapping familiars of important members of the government, demanding a way to get out of the country. But it was in vain, not even the highest members of the government could escape. Then they started building "Shelters", out of very resistant metals and stocking up on food, little did they knew that the radiation was going to be enhanced by the metals, causing a more painful death. The ones that couldn't afford to make a "shelter" started robbing everywhere, others threw parties non-stop. In other words, everyone had lost their mind. Saying that everyone had lost their minds is not exactly true, as there were a couple of people here and there that were still thinking logically, you could said I was one of them. Ooooh... I could actually see this happening in a time of crisis... Kinda reminds me of "The Day After" or one of those type of mini-series I saw a few years ago... Kinda makes me wanna take a Cynide tablet. magnetized material surrounded my shelter, I might be able to survive. I'm sure that you don't want a lesson about basic chemistry, so let's just say that in six days I already had the shelter ready and I just needed to stock up with food Ahh... this section reminds me of my misguided literary+scientific youth... ^^ Very American XD The next day I opened the door and found myself facing a large barricade of boulders, I had overlooked them boulders on my plan. ... Along with radioactive fallout lol Interesting statement. It sums up what I feel about people deciding to shoot each other. Somehow it just doesn't feel right... - - - The story was well introduced - - you introduced a flashback without making it... tacky. Good work there lol The themes were rather simple - - but that was well orchestrated (even if a little cliche). I think the message you've sent across here is that "Nukes suck and terrorists are ghey" along with "I don't wanna be lonely." Simple and very "post-9/11" The plot? Cliche like I mentioned a little earlier - - "I'm not scared of terrorists and nuclear weapons even if everyone else is scared - - but I'd rather die with everyone with everyone else, coz I hate being alone." It's been done before, but I like the way you've presented it. It's easy to read ^^ Das my opinion, I enjoyed it. (although I'd prefer more content in posts - - writing here is different)
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Post by Gleming123 on Apr 30, 2005 0:49:54 GMT 10
Heh, thanks a lot, nice comments Just a lil disclaimer, I'm not the kind of fella that suicides just for being alone, or the kind of fella that acts like an "American", this story was supposed to be for school,and My teacher is kinda...brain...small... so I couldn't use the personality I always use for my stories , and by the way, the story is this short because there was a limit, which I bypassed by A LOT, so I had to delete quite a nice chunk... By the way, maybe I'llpost one of my real good stories, were the main character is not a bundle of nerves like in this one, as I said, maybe Thanks for the nice comments again
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