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Post by Gleming123 on Jun 23, 2005 9:43:27 GMT 10
Hiyas peps, It's me, Gwemmy, bringing you the best story I've ever written, but heh, I haven't written it yet, so I will be adding here as I'm advancing. Anyway, this is an allegory, for those that don't know me, I've had quite a funny life, which has helped me learn a few things, but heh, I'd take pages to explain a tad of it, so I'll just skip the useless stuff and go into the story By the way, the short bio for Gleming, the protagonist of this story, is as follows: Name: Gleming (Didn't see that one coming, eh?) Race: Human, Myrmidon Hair: Nice white hair, not very long, not very short either, though Outfit: White shirt, Blue Dragonhide chaps, a blue berret, blue boots, red gloves, and a red cape (Not a dysney character, mind you) Weapons: A Dragon Long Sword (Just imagine a big, long, red, sword) and a Magic Short Bow ( just imagine a bow, that is short, and it's magical(No flashy stuff)) Personality: You'll find out
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Post by Gleming123 on Jun 24, 2005 5:16:05 GMT 10
Wow, I didn't expect so much feedback...
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Post by Gleming123 on Jun 24, 2005 5:23:33 GMT 10
Chapter 1 (Homer)
Homer woke up, finding himself on a room filled with a vague scent of freshly cut cedar. He glanced at the bed where he had spend the night, printed on the sheets was an emblem, which he recognized instantly; The emblem of Lumbridge. He drifted into his thoughts, trying to find a logic reason for him to be in Lumbridge. As an automatic response, a memory aroused within his mind
(I know it ain't necessary, but some peps find it hard to figure out it is a flash Back)
*Flash Back*
"I knew this was going to end like this" growled Tent
Homer glanced around him, he was imprisoned in a large cage, which was levitating 50 metres above the rooftop of a castle. Below him were two figures. He recognized the first one immediately, it was Gleming, wielding his Dragon Long Sword in his hand. The other figure, which he assumed was a man, was wielding an over-sized spear, and a cloak covering his face. Both of them watched each other without moving a muscle. In a split of a second Gleming lunged sword-first towards the cloaked figure, who nimbly dodged the strike, and with a single blow of spear sent Gleming flying, crashing into a brick-wall.
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Post by Gleming123 on Jun 28, 2005 10:31:51 GMT 10
Heh, no posts...
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Post by Gleming123 on Jun 28, 2005 10:32:08 GMT 10
"Foolish mortal, there's no way you can defeat me" he hissed Gleming got back to his feet with difficulty " I'm not done with you yet Wandereau" "Just look at yourself, you can barely stand up, you're mediocre, you stand no chance"
"Im down, but not out," he grasped his sword and gave Wandereau a sly smile " You'll repent for eternity in hell that you didn't killed me when you had the chance"
A familiar voice spoke behind Homer "Fool, he is only earning himself a more painful death," muttered Nate "he cant hurt Wandereau, let alone kill him"
There was an eerie glittering on the tip of Wandereau's spear, and before Gleming could react, a giant fire ball had already engulfed him. He just smiled again and waited until the crimson flames ceased jumping on his clothes. Without warning, he had already dashed towards Wandereau, who gave a quick swipe with his spear at him, Gleming dodged it and landed a quick kick on his chest, followed by a second kick, which he used as impulse for a back flip, while Wandereau landed heavily on the floor. Gleming unsheathed his dragon long sword in mid-air and landed magestically on his feet.
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Post by Sailorgalaxy on Jun 28, 2005 12:26:23 GMT 10
I like it,Glem! And i know why the people aren't reading your story, maybe your story is too good for them?Or maybe they just don't have time? Or maybe they just flat out don't want to?
Its still good though....so um, when do you think the next add will be done?Cause i really wanna see more.
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Post by Gleming123 on Jun 28, 2005 12:35:16 GMT 10
lol, thanks, I guess
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Post by Gleming123 on Jun 28, 2005 12:35:58 GMT 10
Wandereau staggered to his feet, watching with terror how the last thing he had expected to happen that night was happening before his eyes.
The fear was quickly replaced by pure rage. He hurled his own spear off the rooftop. "You fool, you think you've already won the battle just because you managed to hit me once? Heh, you'll be the one repenting your foolishness in hell for eternity"
With that said, Wandereau levitated a few metres, then a transparent black orb covered him, which started growing, along with Wandereau, who began a mutation.
Another voice spoke behind Homer, "It's all over, we've lost" whimpered Lord
"Breakfast is ready!" shouted Sailor
"What the fudge?" exclaimed Homer
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Post by Gleming123 on Jun 28, 2005 22:36:04 GMT 10
Someone read me
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Post by Chibi Jen on Jun 29, 2005 0:00:18 GMT 10
Keep bumping this topic, and I'll consider it spamming.
You cannot force people to read your fics.
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Post by Gleming123 on Jun 29, 2005 0:26:16 GMT 10
I wasn't forcing, though, just constantly begging ^_^
I'll stop anyway, peps here can't see real art when it's screaming at their face, pffft
lol jk
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Post by Gleming123 on Jul 1, 2005 22:42:59 GMT 10
I'll start writing the next part now...
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Post by Digital Leonardo on Jul 1, 2005 23:42:34 GMT 10
Rather short for a chapter. Kind of insulting to the readers on some of the comments...
Kind of starts up to fast. You need to give a little more lead way to introduce your story. Rather then introducing it all in chapter one, maybe spread out.
Also, this may be a nitpick, but... Release the chapter, all together. Not just in small clumps.
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Post by Gleming123 on Jul 2, 2005 3:02:08 GMT 10
you see, you're talking with the world's biggest slacker 'ere, I don't like writing a lot of story in one swipe, Takes the fun out of it, and causes 'teh writer's block'
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Post by Digital Leonardo on Jul 2, 2005 3:13:20 GMT 10
you see, you're talking with the world's biggest slacker 'ere, I don't like writing a lot of story in one swipe, Takes the fun out of it, and causes 'teh writer's block' Then maybe you should wait untill it is all done. It is rather 'sloppy' to only post paragraphs or chapters at a time. I under standing posting chapter at a time, but breaking the chapters into smaller post is really just... overly lazy. It really dosn't cut it.
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